Confused emotions children experience while living in a split family home and tips to Help your stepchild adjust emotionally to the two environments.
Try stepping into the mind of a child to understand just how confusing it must be to live in two homes with two sets of rules and routines.
I think as adults we expect the child to just adapt and deal with it. Children are emotionally growing and its crucial to nurture and help the child understand and adapt to the new living situation.
Having a child live in your home half of the time or some of the time can be difficult for us to adjust to and I think if the child has a positive adjustment it will make it much easier adjustment for all family members including you!
During my journey as a stepmom we had 50\50 custody and I understand how confusing living in two homes were for my stepdaughter. Now we have her full-time and don't need to adjust to two homes anymore. But now I'm on a mission to help other stepmoms going through what I did not have to figure out these tough experiences on their own.
Below are some tipsI learned to help your stepchild adjust to living in two homes.
Tip #1 - Have a special belonging in each home from the other home. I pillow, blanket, toy or stuffed animal.
Tip #2 - When talking about switching homes keep it positive and acknowledge the fun things they do at the other parents home.
*This part can be hard but suck it up and be the adult.
Co parenting researchers say to stay calm and keep all conversations about the other parent positive and not to speak badly or un supportive of the other parent.
Tip #3 - Tell the child how lucky they are to have two homes. They receive double the love.
Many times when we had a 50\50 arrangement my step-daughter she wanted to stay with us. My husband and I would talk to her about how lucky she is to have two homes and tell her all of her toys missed her.
Bonus Parent Tip - Put the child's feelings and emotions before your own. Hearing a child talk about how happy they are at the other home can be difficult but at the end of the day what is best for the child's emotional growth is most important.
A happy child will make your home a positive & well balanced living experience.
Living your BEST stepmom life starts with having an open mind to learning new techniques and trying to tactics with your family. Happy family = a happy life.
If you liked this blog I would love a comment below. If you need some further in depth help or support book a one on one call with me.
-Jessica Phifer-Patterson
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